10 Reasons why Nerds make better boyfriends

Searching for a boyfriend? Simple. Go to Bishan Lane 8 and pick your pick.
And why there, rather than Bukit Timah? Here are 10 reasons.

1. Nerds are all thin

Have you ever seen a nerd who was fat? yeah, there might be, but very very few. After all, someone who memorises his calories intake would not end up being fat. After all, thinking does burn fats too. You like thin skinny guys, take your pick.

2. Nerds are useful

In this tech-savvy world, it’s great to have a bf who can fix your laptop, calculator and almost anything which is plugged into the wall work. And when you complain with that loud whiny voice "my IE crasheddddd. how do you use Firefox!!!", a nerd would be able to regurgitate you a 99-page instruction manual in the blink of an eye, whilest the normal guy would be "HUH? fAirYforks? is that a relative of the chihuahua?"

3. Nerds are romantic

Yes, nerds are romantic. Their idea of romance might be to make up a spiffy web-page with all the reasons why they love you, with links to pictures of you and sonnets, but hey, it lasts longer than flowers! Instead of having another day of card-swiping at a mall with that rich boyfriend of yours, why not be creative and unique in this capitalistic romance age!

4. Nerds come in all shapes and sizes

Due to their neglected status, there are a a plentiful of stocks to choose from. You like ‘em tall and slender? There are plenty out there. You like ‘em smaller with more meat on their bones? Got that too.

5. Nerds are smart.

Who doesnt like to live a life of comfort? Nerds are smart and would probably become the CEO down the road or even a MP. Upset at ministers’ high pay? Why not be their wives? Then you wont be upset anymore!

6. Nerds are low-maintenance

Nerds do not need much. Cup noodles/McDonalds would more than suffice to fill them up completely. And they wont complain — because they like their food.

7. Nerds are not picky

They would love you just as much without your make-up or even in your messy hair. If you gain a few kgs, they won’t try their best to make you feel like crap.

8. Nerds are well mannered

Physics Olympiad Champion, President Scholar, so many of them out there. Most of them have "Manners for Dummies" imprinted in their minds, they could write a even better book. They treat you with utmost respect and like you for the way you are. And they dont smoke nor drink excessively. How can this be bad?

9. Nerds dont go “Yaw dawg whazzap!!”

They spell properly, use correct punctuation, improve your vocabulary with a few bombastic words and even if they spew profanities, you wouldnt understand it. Would you like to have a bf who goes "y00 hAo r u 2daE, mi feeLZZ veri siAnzzz lehx. Eye ms Yew worhxxx. Muackkks!"

10. Nerds treat you like a treasure

This is because of scarcity. Nerds have it hard when it comes to getting girlfriends so they treasure them a lot more. It’s like how affluent people can’t finish their food and toss them away but the starving in Africa will lick every grain up.

Isnt this enough to convince you to get a nerdy boyfriend now!